NEW LATEST FUNNY JOKES IN HINDI...............

Allaah, Mere dhande mein barkat de

 

Ek aadmi dua kar raha tha..
‘Ya allah, mere dhande mein barkat de’
Peechhe se aawaz aayi
Koi abhi aameen mat bolo re, sab ke sab nipat jaoge.
Saala kafan bechta hai!!

Santa ki Maa 

Santa ki Maa:- 20 saal tak meri koi aulad nahi hui
Press reporter:- Fir apne kya kiya?
Santa ki Maa:- Fir mai 21 saal ki hui to papa ne meri shadi krai. Fir ja ke Santa hua.. !!

 

top funny Latest Bade Chhote Jokes

Bade: kya hua, bada pareshan lag raha hai
Chhote: haan, yaar thodi tabiyat kharab hai
Bade: kya ho gaya? doctor ko dikhaya?
Chhote: arey yaar dil mein dard hai… nahi dikhaya, Dr. Mehta ko dikhane hi ja raha hoon
Bade: Dr. Mehta ko! arey wo to dimag ka doctor hai?
Chhote: Haan, yaar Doctor mehta ko hi…wahi sahi karega na
Bade: Tu pagal ho gaya hai kya? heart ki beemari ke liye heart ke doctor ko dikha, pagalpan ke ilaaj
karne wale doctor ko kyun dikha raha hai?
Chhote: Arey wahi to dil ka ilaaj karega na…
Bade: Abe, Wo kaise?
Chhote: Tune nahi suna… Dil To Pagal Hai!!! ….hahahah
Bade: Bakwas band kar!!

latest funny jokes.. Reaction of Celebs after India’s successful mars mission

Alia bhatt: Ab ‘MARS’ wali chocolate aur bhi sasti ho jayegi..
Rahul gandhi: Main mars se chunav ladunga…
Priyanka Gandhi: We should change the name of mars to Rajiv Gandhi Lal Grah.
Anil ambani = my IPL team cricketers will be from MARS. i will name it after my wife’s name
“MARS TINA HOTTERS”.
Sonia Gandhi = Martians should be declared as Minorities…
Kejriwal = It is illegal step by Modi’s government to conquer mars. Hum MARS par dharna karenge..
Geelani = We want Mars free from India…
Chidambaram = Mars is a Special Economic Zone area. It Should be given to Robert Vadra..
Akhilesh yadav = Mars par Uttar pradesh se jyaada apradh hotey hain.
And the best statement comes from pakistan
Bilawal Bhutto = Hum Mars ka ek ek inch bharat se le lawange ….

funny jokes of Sanjay Dutt aur Baapu

In Jail..
Sanjay Dutt: Jailer sahab, Mujhe fir se baapu dikh rela hai!
Jailer: Kidhar?
Sanjay Dutt: Wo udhar dhoti mein..
Jailer: Abe Asaram bapu hai...

most funny Latest Hindi Chutkule Jokes

Boss- Tumhari ability?
Lady secretary-
Young hoon,
Dynamic hoon,
Sincere hoon,
Honest hoon,
Hardworking hoon,
Qualified hoon,
Experienced hoon,
Deserving hoon,
Typing janti hoon,
File sahi rakhti hoon,
Computer me expert hoon,
Thoda accounts bhi janti hoon,
Boss: aur kuch
Lady: modern khayalat ki hoon,
Disease free aur healthy hoon,
Khana bhi accha pakati hoon,
Sabse Jaruri Baat ki
Apne flat me akeli rehti hoon…!
Boss: bas kar pagli,
ab kya joinning ke Din promotion legi!!

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Naughty Sunny Leone Jokes

Once the famous superstar Rajinikanth sent a non-veg joke to an innocent girl.
Now we know that girl as Sunny Leone!
————-
Whats The Similarity Between Sunny Deol And Sunny Leone?
They Both Shout A Lot In Their Movies!
—
If Sunny Leone gets married to Sunny Deol. She will become Sunny Deol!
————-
Sunny Leone participates in Amitabh Bachchan’s Kaun Banega Crorepati.
Amitabh: Which is your favourite round in KBC?
Sunny Leone: After lot of thinking says… Fastest Finger First!

————-
Sunny Leone arrived at a Railway Station for a shooting..
Bhikhari: Behanji 1 rupaiya dedo…
Sunny Leone gave him 1000 Rs.
Secretary: Why u gave him 1000 Rs..?
Sunny Leone: Pehli bar kisi ne behan kaha ha, dil bhawuk ho gaya!
————-
Postal department has issued Sunny Leone stamps.
Men are confused which side to lick and which side to stick!

Funny WhatsApp Jokes on Rahul and Pakistan after Narendra Modi’s Win in Elections

Agar aap ab ki baar modi sarkar sun sun ke pak chuke hain, to suniye kuchh naya…
Surakshit Kaale mere baal, Pagal ho gaya Kejriwal
Chyavanprash ho Sona Chandi, Nahin Jeetega Rahul Gandhi
——————
Ab to Congress ke bhi achche din aane wale hain
ND tiwari ke baad, Digvijay Bhabhi laane wale hain!
————–
Upar Chhatri, Neeche Chhaya
Bhaag Rahul, Modi Aaya!!
—————-
Rahul jahan bhi ho Ghar aa jao, mata aur bahen dono paresan hai. Koi kuchh nahi kahega, sari jimmedari Manmohan uncle ne li hai. Jaldi aajao bas…
—————–
New Congress slogan :
Abki baar……..
Antim sanskaar
—————–
Urgent Update – Pakistan declares On GeoTv – we don’t want Kashmir now…but we will not give karachi.
——————
Pakistan mein dast rokne ki bikri mein aaj subah se apratyashit badhawa dekhne ko mila hai!!
——————-
16 May 2014 ko dopahar delhi railway station se pakistan ke liye special train rawana hogi..
Shahrukh Khan, Lalu Yadav sahi jin bhi mahanubhaavo ne Modi ke PM banne par desh chhodne ki ghoshna ki thi, wo sabhi samay pat station pahunch jaayein!
1) 5 saal se bade bachcho ka poora ticket lagega (Rahul Gandhi Ka Bhi)
2) Jeb Katro se saawdhaan (Train mein chidambaram bhi honge)
3) Nav-vivahit jode ke liye S-1 mein seat rahegi (Diggi Raja)
—————-
Aap ke paas Seatein Chaar
Ab ki baar Modi Sarkar!!
——————-
Finally, the bizarre is over and here goes the awards for different category.
Best Actor- Aravind Kejriwal
Best Debut child actor- Rahul Gandhi
Best female actor in supporting role- Mamta Banerjee
Best female actor in negative role- Soniya Gandhi
Best actor in comic role- Digvijay Singh
Life time achievment award-Lal Krishna Advani
Movie of the year-Abki baar Modi Sarkar
Its heard that Anurag Basu has approached Manmohan Singh for “Barfi 2″.